Exploring a train of thought- The problem isn't Autism?

I haven't done this before, but I am going to share with you all an unfinished train of thought. I've been tossing this around in my head for a while. It's still very broad in terms of concepts explored.... but it's a start. 

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I've been wondering, since I honestly believe that Autism is not a "disorder" but instead is a different kind of neurology, where that leaves me in terms of calling it a disability. 

I have tried to identify key things that make an Autistic person different, and then figure out what is behind each thing that is actually in common with a person who is not Autistic (or a "person lacking Autism" which is a phrase I read this week, and L O V E).

So, if (in the case of my kids)......
Meltdowns = not having sensory regulation needs met
Not wanting heaps of social contact = introvert 
Struggling to keep pace at school= system designed in a way that doesn't suit his/her learning style
Stimming= society believes some stims are inappropriate based on some arbitrarily decided-by-no-one-in-particular set of constructs

Then I come to this.....
Theory- autism is not so much a disability in itself, but society disables Autistic people by being unwilling >to accept some differences as part of the normal or >make accommodations to support their needs.

Thoughts?