I mentioned on the This is not what I signed up for Facebook page a week or so ago that we were having a difficult week. It's turned into a difficult month.
On top of the usual ASD related things we manage daily, Hubby's Bipolar symptoms have been increasing and causing him issues that have led to him needing to reduce his working hours.
As if that isn't enough we have also seen the addition of 3 other medical issues in the family over the last few weeks. I do my best not to complain, but I sure have struggled the last couple of weeks in particular to maintain a positive frame of mind.
Any one of the things we manage on its own wouldn't be that hard to deal with. Even a couple of them wouldn't be too bad.
But, honestly, I keep thinking to myself, how much more do we have to deal with here?!
I mean, every time something new comes up, it's just another thing to add to the rest. And usually involves another onslaught of paper work to be filled in. Not to mention the added emotional stress and anxiety load. Then I find it difficult to sleep, and so the tiredness cycle starts up..... and my negative thoughts sometimes get the better of me.
I struggle not to dwell on the thoughts of envy that others have so little to cope with, yet still manage to complain so much. It takes a lot of self discipline to keep my thoughts on the track of remembering that the hard times come and go, things always work out OK, and there is always something to be thankful for.
Sometimes I have to give in to a bit of a cry, and just let it all out for a while so that I can clear my mind and get on with things. But, at the end of the day- or maybe more appropriately, at the beginning of each morning- get on with things I must. So I do, most days with a smile on my face, even though I might be wondering what the next thing to add to the rest will be.